Pay no attention

to the woman behind the curtain who is going to distract you from the fact that, with Vermont in its second day of ridiculous 85+ temps, I haven't picked up knitting needles in two days.

Instead, I'm going to show you this:


Which is a set from Dale Baby Collection NR 110. I'm sorry if you love this pattern, the book definitely seems to be out of print. I got my copy in...dear God, I was still in college, so before 2001. I had every intention of making that little jumpsuit for my cousin's firstborn...but um...yeah. Nope. I was defeated by stranding and dpns. And I just don't think I'm crazy enough to try that again, but I am smitten with the little yellow set.

Ooo, pretty, right? Pretty... :)

And really, what gives with this weather? It's just not acceptable, and whoever ordered it needs a kick in the head. Honestly. It's supposed to drop back down into the 70s tomorrow, and I can live with that. This almost 90 stuff...I hated it before, and with the pregnant metabolism keeping me warmer anyway, I thought I was just going to die yesterday. It was bad.

Robb also got a good laugh in yesterday, when Mom came over; she had managed to find some really cute quasi-maternity tops at Kohl's, which will help me get through this ridiculous heat wave, since they're cut so that they can be worn when you're hardly pregnant, and let out when you're more pregnant. Sounds like a plan to me! But the big reason she came over was because she'd finished up the hat on the Wee One Welcome Set which she is knitting with Koigu Kersti, and she needed to learn how to do mattress stitching to seam the hat up. I also had to attempt to teach her the make-one increase, which didn't go as well. She didn't believe me that all you do is pick up the little bar between stitches and knit it -- she kept asking why I was "flipping" it around. I am a very bad teacher, and did my best, but I've been encouraging her to sign up for a class sometime. She has really good knitting instincts, but doesn't trust them at all.

Anyway, Robb enjoyed the whole thing, because the stereotypical image is Mom -- or Grandma -- teaching the little daughter how to knit -- and even though that's how we started, some twenty-three years ago now, it's now completely reversed. I guess I just made so much stuff up in college, when there wasn't anyone to ask, that I lose patience with being asked to do it "the right way." I already told her to bail on the idea of m1r and m1l. It's too confusing for the first time you do something, and anyway, I can't ever remember which one is which anyway.

Oh well. :)

I woke up feeling happy and healthy and hungry for the first time in a really long time. One of those silly days where I looked at Robb this morning and just burst into tears because when he smiled at me, I just felt completely safe and loved and magical.

And the best part? He looked at me, said "You're having one of those scary, wonderful, reassuring moments, aren't you?" And I nodded, and then he just held me while I cried for a bit.

He's a good 'un, always.

I liked smiling.

Snicker.

Okay, so I'm awake before Robb (as I usually am, since he sleeps until 10 or 11 most mornings, no big deal), and I'm at my computer, poking through blogs, reading emails, etc.

I keep hearing this...rhthymic, kind of grinding sound. I'm panicking, trying to figure out what fan or bearing in my computer might be making that sound, and what I can do about it before it explodes and takes out my, I don't know, motherboard, which I can't afford to replace just this minute.

And then I realize.

It's not my computer.

It's my boyfriend.

Snoring.

Hehe.

Here's a picture of the ladybug sweater, just to convince you that I still know how to knit.

One more set of ladybugs to do, and then the rest of the body is pretty much plain knitting. Each sleeve has a row of ladybugs, and if I'm not bored to tears, so does the hat.

I've stalled a bit because a.) I've been on an anime kick lately, and stranded knitting+subtitles=big mess and b.) I've just been lazy in the sudden heat that Vermont is throwing at me. 85 degrees? What is this nonsense? The world is lucky I have the next two days off, and all I need to do is sit around and pant, that's all I'm sayin.

There's another Dale sweater I'm considering...It must be fairly out of print, because I bought the book some five years ago, and I can't find the pattern anywhere online, I'll scan it in if anyone wants to see, it's a pretty patterned sweater with stars and moons on the cuffs and the button band. The question in my mind is whether knitting stranded in cotton will make me want to rip my face off, and I should just continue knitting colored wool sweaters (the colorwork on this one is much less, so I wouldn't hate myself for knitting it in wool in a three month size, and seeing it outgrown more quickly) and save the cute little kimono tops for the wool.

Thoughts?

Well.

The unexplained crying jags have given way to a light melancholy, which I can cope with. Yesterday was completely absurd. My mother and I decided to see what was available in the line of maternity where here in nowhere'sville, New England, not that I need this sort of thing yet, but my clothes are starting to snug up, and my appearance is important in retail, so...

We went to every store in this town that sells any kind of maternity wear. Guess how many tops I saw that would be appropriate for work?

Zero.
Zip.
Zilch.
None.
Nada.

This is slightly incorrect. Technically, I could wear those stupid, fruity, brightly colored, big patterned shirts that have the cross under the bust and the floaty panel under the belly and the fairy sleeves. If I was 17 and pregnant, I would be in love with those. However, being 27 and pregnant, I have some desire to maintain my current appearance, which is...well, khakis and button down shirts for work.

I don't see why this is hard. I'm certainly not the only woman in retail who dresses this way, why is there NOTHING for me to buy to wear to work when I'm all gigantic?

Grr.

It didn't help that my mother was not on the ball with her self-editing yesterday. The couple of comments that just stopped me in my tracks: first, I commented on a couple of shirts she was saying were pretty and said "That's just not me, Mom." She looked me dead in the eye and said "Well, you're not you anymore. So there."

That stopped me, and made me want to cry in the middle of T.J. Maxx. I don't believe that I can't be me and be a mom. Yeah, things will be different, but I'm still me, right? The base material is the same, it's just that there's an added definition now. Someone tell me this is true.

Then, she asked me if I'd put on any weight since I'd gotten pregnant. Stupidly, I told her yes, probably 8 or 10 pounds. Then, with the grouchiness that I can only imagine hearing from a woman who has been on a diet my entire life, and who has completely forgotten that I was trying to get my body in shape before all this happened and my energy went out the window, she said "Well, you'd better slow down, if they only want you to gain 25 pounds."

I stopped and looked at her and said "We are not talking about this again, okay? Thanks."

I love my mom with all my heart, and she's treating me very well right now...sometimes she just talks before she thinks, ya know?

Anyway, I haven't knit a stitch all week, because with my sudden snitfits, it doesn't seem wise to have lace or Dale in my hands when the urge to break things arises. I do think things are levelling out -- it's like everything is going backwards, I got moody first, then sick, now the sickness is fading, and the moodiness returns.

I promise there will be knitting to see when you next visit this happy-go-lucky blog!

OH!

And, I forgot to say, thanks to everyone who wished me a happy mother's day! You guys made my day.

See, I'm not always a brat. I'm just...work is...and the stress!...and I'm sick of being sick!...

Ya.

Grumpity grump

I'm sulky today. I think that's the only word for me. I woke up obscenely late (for the girl who is regularly at work at 6am) and finally rolled out of bed (only because Robb was snoring, tha jerk!) at 8am. I took advantage of Netflix's new Watch It Now! thing to watch The Prince & Me, which I figured to be cute and annoying, but a sure thing. I adore Julia Stiles, and I thought I'd have fun.

Instead, this movie...just got on my nerves. I don't quite know why, really, but it...peeved me off. I was trying to knit the ladybug sweater, and the ladybugs of course weren't coming out well, which irritated me, and then I went back to bed for awhile, and when I got up again, I felt dizzy and sick despite having eaten like a good girl when I got up earlier, which prompted the least healthy response I know of (fine, if my body doesn't want me to eat, I won't, nah!). I didn't say I was being smart, just grumpy.

I did about twenty seven bazillion loads of laundry, but you can actually see both our floor and the papasan again (no, B, haven't changed out the cushion yet, haven't figured out what to do with the old one), so that's something. And then I curled up on the couch, knit more ladybug sweater (they were behaving this time) and watched Just Like Heaven.

This should have been a great day. Why am I being such a brat? Robb is even bringing me home my favorite calzone from my favorite pizza place. And I'm being such a snot, and I know it, but my ability to fix it? Gone.

Sigh.

I'm too lazy to take pictures for you, I'm sorry. Tomorrow. Promise.

Lookee what I got.

So, went to the doctor today, was pronounced very boring, (which is good, in this case), and after some procedures which really made me feel she ought to have bought me dinner and a movie first, was rewarded with this.


That's our little one. Almost an inch now, we saw little arms and legs, and it flipped around a couple of times for us, which was very nice. I got a little weepy, and Robb's telling his WoW friends, which is about the same, for him.

Everything looks fantastic. The ultrasound puts me at 9 weeks, a little earlier than I'd been led to believe before, and my due date was revised to December 13th. Which is not a Friday, I just checked.

The little one's heart is beating at about 174 beats per minute -- doctor said that was great -- and everything looks fantastic.

Yay.

Here's what else I've been up to:

This is the Dale ladybug sweater -- I think it's out of patternbook 152, but it's all the way across the room, and I don't want to check. I decided to do this one in the 6 month size, which will either mean it gets tons of wear or none, but I just had a kind of feeling not to make it in the newborn size, so I'm not going to. Nah. It's coming along well; I got bored and flipped the hem up to make it stop rolling on me, and it still has its lumpy places, but all in all, I'm extremely pleased with how my colorwork is coming out. Go me!

And, because someone might ask, here's the inside:

A weight has been lifted off my mind, and I feel very much better. I'm going to go drink a gallon of water, and stretch out on the sofa. Maybe watch Fellowship of the Ring. Who knows??

Smiles, all around.

Pictures to come

I'm okay, I'm okay. I've been sick (again) and exhausted (again) and Vermont caught on that it's summer, making it hot and humid here (again). My job is stressing me out, which is probably increasing my symptoms.

But I'm not dead.

More to come.

Trading Nausea for mood swings

Seriously. I'm like a fifteen year old girl, flying off the handle about nothing, weeping in meetings, and it's worse than being fifteen, because I have the intellectual capacity to understand that I'm acting like a crazy person, but still no ability to do anything about it. Oh well. I keep apologizing, and people laugh and pat me on the head. I hope they still think I'm cute in a few more months! Or maybe I'll just distract them by letting them pat the belly. People are starting that already, and I want to yell a bit. I'm not showing; I just look like there have been a few too many calzones 'round the middle. Oh well, 'salgood. :)

So, the two big projects right now, apart from unbelievably tiny sweaters:


This is the Gothic Leaf pattern by Sivia Harding, although her pattern is for a stole, and I'm making a scarf. If any of you were around when I was knitting her Hanging Garden Stole, you might remember the relationship I have with large, rectangular things. yeah. There's a reason why I don't have a baby blanket WIP. Just sayin'.

The yarn is Yarn Pirate, the only skein of such that I've ever managed to score in the craziness surround updates at The Loopy Ewe. The color is Quicksilver, and I'm loving the gentle shading, which I don't think distracts from the lace, since it's a monochrome pallet. (I know that's a right spelling of pallet, but is that the right spelling of pallet? Anyway.) This, I think, will be a gorgeous scarf for fall, when I want something around my neck, but it's too warm for my wears-like-iron wool scarf that I've had for a few years.

This is the first repeat plus a bit of the Absolutely Fabulous Shawl from Colinette. This colorway is Antique, if I remember correctly, and I'm totally in love. It's so funky and crazy, it will be wonderful to wrap up in come winter time, and plenty wide enough to provide discretion AND warmth. Yay!

Days off are good for watching movies and knitting and just generally slobbing around. That's my plan for today. Hope yours is just as fun!

100th post

On blogger, anyway.

Note to self: stop asking the boyfriend questions at 1am when you're both too tired to have a conversation. It will only stress you out, and cause him to consider you to be even more irrational than you currently are.

Anyone want to give me good reasons that we should be buying a home, and not renting? So far I have 1.) creation of equity 2.) more reasonable cost (even here in stupid VT) 3.) and it just makes me feel safer, somehow. less at someone else's whim. I'll take any other suggestions that anyone else has to offer.

Also, he's suddenly disliking the middle name of Joseph, which has huge familial associations for me. I'm hormonally messed up enough that even typing that makes me want to cry, and that does not lend itself to reasoned discussion.

So.

Pictures of SEX from the weekend:

The Colinette Abfab kit; I've made two of these before, the diamond pattern for my mother, and the stripe afghan for my now-ex girlfriend. This time, it's for me-me-me, and it's going to be a shawl, a nursing shawl, to be precise, and it's going to be exquisite. Or else. :)

Malabrigo and Cherry Tree Hill Supersock

Rowan Calmer
And Studio Mohair and Lorna's Laces Worsted.

I made out like a bandit.

First project; The Absolutely Fabulous Shawl. Great for knitting while watching 24. When not watching 24, or when having slightly more attention-span, the Yarn Pirate Quicksilver I scored awhile back is turning into a scarf version of Sivia Harding's Gothic Lace Stole. Wish me luck!